The Key to Transformation – Helping Your Inner Child Grow Up

The last time I remember being a child was at the age of 6.  Since then my path was scattered with forms of abuse, anger, manipulation and codependency.  I quickly learned protection, shame, guilt and to my surprise now; productivity.

Productive was this camouflaged way of coping; my default.

I learned to mask my emotions of fear, guilt, shame and blame with external rewards such as honors societies, high paying jobs, marriage and a Master’s Degree.   I had accomplishments that some people dreamed of; yet every single accomplishment led to further feelings of emptiness.

I was HIGHLY productive and yet I was EMPTY.

As I became more aware, the feelings of emptiness drove more and more fear into every ounce of my being.  I knew I had a purpose, but I literally felt like I couldn’t feel it.  I had spent my entire life learning how to stuff my feelings so far away so I could cope with life.  I replaced feeling with production.

I could check of 1000’s goals and feel like I had accomplished zero.

Eventually, the feeling of emptiness became too strong.  I grew too far to allow this pattern to repeat.  It was time for transformation….

I realized that through my accomplishments, my codependent marriage and relationship with my Mother, I actually was allowing little Laural to make all of the choices.  She had my voice and I lost my control and my power.

However, I couldn’t just demand it back.  I needed to nurture this little girl and help her grow.  This took hard work of releasing judgement on myself, trusting my intuition and demanding that I do have the right to feel.

Transformation starts with the child inside of you.  Can you pinpoint the moment the child inside of you froze?  Stopped developing? Started protecting you and causing you to be fearful?

Triggers can be abuse, tragic events, loss or hurtful words.  Subconsciously we disconnect from this inner child and he/she stays in that moment of time frivolously wanting to protect you from ever feeling that way again.

What about your past is preventing your child from growing up?

It is time to thank them for their love and protection but it is also time to nurture their growth and to take your power back…